So much is Happening around here!

We are happy to announce that it is beginning to feel like we may be a family of 5(all in the same house) by the end of this year. The investigation went smoothly and our attorney told us that, in his opinion, 'this case will succeed.'  So we are proceeding!  We are doing last minute paperwork for the agency that we joined late in the game, and waiting for the courts in Uganda to get back from a break.  They break from July 15 - August 15.

When we get a court date, we will prolly have about a 2 week notice and we will have to be there. Then it's off to court we go, wait for the ruling, get approval from IOM, Embassy, Passports and Visa etc... lots of business in Africa.  We are expecting this to take somewhere between 4-6 weeks.  We are trying to gear up for this part of the adventure also.  It will be interesting to see how Sheldon Jaxon and Penny Vivi do, outside of their comfort zones for that amount of time. hehehe  They are excited about going to visit the country where their sister is from and learn all about it. We think it will be a great experience for them and will also good bonding time for all of us. Can you say slower pace of life!?!?! 

Us being there for quite some time has caused us to consider other aspect of our normal and we have decided to home school Jax and Viv.  We have been considering this off and on for at least a year, but timing decided that we go for it now.  I wish it was a time where I could sit and comb through the gazillions of curriculum options that are available for our two very different learners.  But it is not.  Thankfully we have quite a few friends who have proven to be great resources in this area.  We will do our best, and if it doesn't work for us.... we will go back to the way things were.  This is what is best for us right now and I would appreciate support in this endeavor as I don't have the energy right now to defend it.  :P

Back to the Adoption.
With our adoption criteria left quite open we really expected to be adding a 3-4 year old to our family.  But God decided that we needed a tinier one.  She is not quite 1.  So the bed that I purchased will not work for her 14 pound self and the car seat that we saved from our other kiddos won't work either.  As all of you know, surprise expenses aren't awesome, ever.  BUT let me tell you what is! We have had friends step up and offer to let us have a crib and convertible car seat!  My people are amazing!  Seriously, if I have learned nothing else throughout this journey, I have learned that we are surrounded by some of the best of God's amazing people.  We aren't allowed to disclose her information at this time.  Just know that we are so excited and blessed to be her family!  And we are anxiously awaiting the day we go get her!

SO appreciating all of you, Village!  XO

tif

Referral

I thought when we got a referral I would scream that news from the mountain tops!!  That I would be so excited that my fb friends wouldn't be able to NOT know.  :) 
 
It's just not the case. 

There are many factors that have played into this discovery.  The main one is that it's not a sure thing.  We have received information about a child, but we won't know if it's going to be our forever child, until the investigations are complete and our attorney and agency are comfortable enough with the case to proceed.  And even then, I won't be able to breathe easy.  We will still have to get through court, and the embassy and multiple other hoops.  I know that I will not be able to relax until we are on the plane heading home from Africa.  That's just something I know about me. There are a lot of potential hiccups on this journey. 

One of the other factors is that it. is. sad.  In order for a child to be an orphan and need us to adopt them, they have suffered a loss.  I have not just realized that fact, but it is made more real when you are faced with a specific child and a personal story of loss.

It's heartbreaking.

Please pray for this new stage in the process, for the people involved in the investigation, and that if they find some family that they will be able to care for the child.  That would be sad for us, but it would be blessing for the child either way.  We are trying to guard our hearts and prepare them for either option.

I keep telling myself not to get excited...yet.  buuuuut, I spent the 2 days after the email getting Jaxon's new room ready and moved him upstairs.  And have spent my spare time researching how to care for African hair. ;)

Thanks, Village, for being along with us on this journey.

2 months later

So, yes, it has been a long time.  I realize that.  The reason excuse is lame, but it's mine;  I was obeying the rule of 'if you don't have sumpthin' nice to say, don't say nothin' at all.' -Thumper

I have not been angry for the last 2 months, or even in the depths of despair.  I have just haven't had anything particularly nice to say so...  There have been days that I have basked in the Father's love and was eager to learn the lesson He had for me.  Some others that I wanted to shake my finger toward Heaven, and say, "I don't want to learn any more lessons today!"  Sometimes I have wondered if I dreamed this whole thing up and that it is never going to come to fruition, and I have brought my whole village(you) out with me on a snipe hunt.  ooOo the doubt that can creep in.  We are not out of the woods.  I will still experience these days over and over on this journey.

I do have a bit of progress to report now. And I am feeling ready to share.  We have decided to use an agency.  Those of you who are familiar with International Adoption Processes may understand this better than others.  If you want the short version, skip from here to the last paragraph.  It won't hurt my feelings, I won't even know! :)  We have been trying to do this independently all along, because we felt like we needed to be involved in some of the decisions that most agencies will not let you be part of.  For example, knowing the name of the attorney they use, picking your own attorney, visiting the baby homes, meeting or emailing with the directors.  They want to do all of that for you.  I don't think that their motive is evil; as if they don't want you to know that they are doing things unethically.  I think they just want to remain the middle men.  They could not answer the hard questions that I had about trafficking and we don't play like that.  Just hoping that the people they work with know what they are doing, nah. 
We need to be able to research the attorney that they have always used, and visit with the directors.  We aren't the kind of people that can sit by and be lead by the blind.  Furthermore, we want to know that the child is a true orphan.  We want to be certain that the attorney didn't go into the village and pay the families for their youngest child/burden, with a promise that 'they will have a better life if you sign this paper and send them with me.'  

 So we have done a lot of research and are very happy with what we found.  Good ethical people who are trying their best to take care of the children of Uganda.  The dilemma that we have been facing since our visit to Uganda in February is that the directors of the baby homes are hesitant to refer a child to us as independents.  There are a few reasons and one being that they have a hard time getting communication from families who are not with an agency, after the adoption is complete.  The baby homes are required to do post-placement reports on the children that they adopt out.  If a family has an agency they will help the orphanage get the information that they need.  They said that they have had independents in the past who have cut all communication after they had the child at home.  Even cases where they felt like they were good parents who were taking care of the children, but just didn't take the time to let them know that.  Then the baby home is in trouble.  So we understand the hesitation with that.  We have paid for post-placement reports with the agency that did our home study.  But that news wasn't good enough for them. smh

All of that to say.  We are using an agency and told the directors of the baby homes and one of them email me back very quickly saying, 'that is great news and they want to work with us!'   Our attorney is waiting to hear from her this week.  So, my beloved village, please join us in prayer this week as we await some good news.  We have been waiting on good news for a long time now, but we are hopeful that there is a possibility that we could get some soon.

Love you all. Seriously.
tif

not yet & intro to our story

We are ready to go back. But it's not time.  We are longing to be in Uganda. But it's not time.  We miss our friends that we made there. We want Jaxon and Vivi to experience the people and culture that we grew to love in just one week.  We know they will, too.  But it's not time. 

 

Some days are easier than others. I try to enjoy the quiet in my house while my big kids are at school and I can do laundry and clean with out stopping to make Vivi a snack, 3 separate times, and talk Jaxon out of beating his face against his video game controller.  In these moments I know that soon enough I will be spread even a little bit more thin, that I may be doing my work with a child strapped to me, like I was accustomed to just 6 years ago. (wow, has it been that long?!)

 

We have been in steady contact with the people that we met in Kampala's baby homes.  We know that God will finish for us the good work that he started. 

 

________________________________

I have had a few requests from friends who wanted to know how we got started on this journey.  So here is part of the story.

Did you know that Sally Struthers did this to us?  I know that some of you who were a child of the 80's & early 90's, like myself, hafta remember her.  I think they chose her because she had the saddest voice on television then.  And they had her tell us about the children who were starving in Ethiopia.  They showed the tiny African children with distended bellies and flies all over them, starving.  Breaking my 8 year old heart.  I have been called to this mission by God through Sally Struthers. :) He will use whoever he wants, y'all. 

So this has always been the plan, after we were blessed the biological way with babies, we would go this route.  Mikeblair and I discussed this in February of 2013 and decided that if we waiting many longer, our kids would be so self sufficient that we would talk ourselves out of it and it would be 'meant t0' but God never opened the door, kind of dream.  Sometimes God needs for you to be still and other times He says move. 

We started the move by doing research on international adoption on the internet and asking a few of our friends who have made this journey for some pointers.  We quickly found that Ethiopia was a hotspot right now(maybe b/c of Sally) and that scared me.  From what I had found, most of the developing world countries that were doing a high volume of IA, would end up in a mess and be shut down.  When desperate people in desperate situations see a way to make money, they will try to get in on it.  If that means selling children, so be it.  Now, before you judge them, imagine that your children were literally starving....who knows what we are capable of. 

My gut told me that Ethiopia was not a good place for us to start then.  And I don't know about you, but since I hit my 30's...I trust my gut.  So made a list of all of the countries that do IA, then narrowed it down to the countries that we could adopt through, still in Africa (of course, see Sally)  Some have ridiculous regulations.  After I had the list down to the countries that would accept us, I did research on the country itself.  What was the culture?  Why was it a 3rd world?  How recent was the war that tore it apart?

Both Mikeblair and I felt lead toward Uganda, but that is another story for another day.  Thank you all for being part of our village.  God always sends one of you to write me a love note when I am having trouble waiting on His timing.  Your encouragement means more than you know!  Thank you for listening to Him, when he whispers to you that someone needs your encouragement.
Love You All
tif

New things of Spring

 

This is a picture of a simple display of spring clothes for toddlers.  This is an exciting sign of the end of cold, happy baby colors and the promise of warmer weather.  For at least 10 years this has been an extremely happy sign for me.  I hate cold.  I love chubby legs sticking out of new short pants for the season. I have memories of those chubby legs in my house.

But this year, I feel very differently about this.  As I walking into the store, feeling blessed to buy food to feed my family, this display brought tears to my eyes.  What is wrong with me?!  I have a child somewhere, that God has promised to me, that I am SO ready to provide for.  I am ready to know the size and age and gender.  I am ready to tuck them in at night. I am ready to read stories, kiss boo-boos and say "I love you and am so glad that God brought you to us."  I don't know if there is anyone to make sure that they are eating and getting rest.  I doubt that there is someone to comfort when they are crying.  This is breaking my heart, and the display is reminding me that I can't do this for my child yet.

 

 

Some days I am really much better at this than others.  Thank you for the many people who supported us by buying a shirt or jewelry.  I would love for you to use the piece that you bought to remember to pray for us.  When you wear it, or even just when you look at it. Spring is coming I feel the progress and it's similar to babies kicking in my stomach; We are really doing this!

 

I Love you, My Village, and I couldn't do it with out you.                   

.we went to Africa.

Wow.  What a whirlwind week.

We left for Africa on Saturday @8am from KC, and arrived at our guest house in Kampala on Sunday night @midnight. 
On Monday we met with our attorney and got a game plan together and set out to meet with orphanage directors all week.  Of course, I made lots of time for holding babies and playing with the big kids, too.
We met with 6 different directors.  We saw so many people who were inspiring and trying to do what they can for some needy children.  That part elevated my faith in humanity.  But there was also, starring us in the face, the sad reality that there are so many children with out a family. 
Some of the children were scared of us, we were the only white people that had seen.  The word for it is muzungu.  It seemed to be a term of endearment.;)  Some cried when we left.  Some braided my hair.  Some bit us.  Some squeezed us so tight, afraid we would leave too soon.  Some slapped us.  Some checked to see if our color would rub off. Some peed on me.  Some kissed us. Some danced with us.  Some sang for us.  Some just wanted to sit in our laps.
They all touched our hearts.
The trip was completely confirming that we are on the perfect path for our family.  Uganda is a beautiful place filled with beautiful welcoming people.  We felt safe and happy to be in the land where our 3rd child is right now.  That made it a little hard to leave.  But we rest in the fact that we will be going back to be united with that child soon.

Some of you are wondering about a time line.  So are we.  :)  We are waiting on the Lord to put us on the mind and in the heart of the orphanage director who is caring for our child now.  It may be next week, it may be next year.  We don't get to know.  That is the hard part for me.  I am not good at "not knowing" but He is working on me and I am much better at that than I was when we started this Journey, last February.

On the Friday we were there we went to "Friday Market"  It was full of Ugandans selling their crafts and it was amazing.  Of course, I couldn't help but bring some of it home, to share with you all.  We bought a lot of beaded necklaces from ladies who were making the beads right there in front of us.  Awesome.  This helps put food on their tables, not fund the next girls night out.  They are also going to help us bring the child home to our family. 

 long multicolored bead that I have doubled $10

 

 

 

 

 

Shorter colors shown here $10

 

 

 funky colors $10

 

 

 

 

 Mike Blair's Nebraska Family, you know you need these for game day! $10

 

 

 Funky Bracelets $5

 

 

There is so much more to share about or trip... all in good time, my village. I'm still a lil tired!

XO~tif

 

Here we go!

This is going to be short, I am busy, y'all.  But I needed to say that we are feeling ever so blessed.  We just turned in the first round of shirt orders and every time I got another order and sat down to add it to my list it brought tears to my eyes. not even exaggerating.  Each one of you who are supporting us through prayer and love notes and donations have just filled this Blair house love tank to overflowing!  We are stepping out on faith here.  This is not a required trip, but we feel like it is time to do something.  And with as perfectly as everything surrounding it has fallen into place, we know that God is honoring this decision and we have no fear. 

 

 

For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. 

II Timothy 1:7

 

 

 

 



 

 

To those of you who donated formula, your money and efforts are being delivered this week!  You have been doers and that is a credit to you.  Notice that MikeBlair dumped a bunch of candy in with the formula. Surprised? surely not.